Healthcare Training Institute - Quality Education since 1979
CE for Psychologist, Social Worker, Counselor, & MFT!!
In the last section, we discussed various challenges inherent when treating sexually abused boys such as: dependency on physical contact; drastic mood shifts; failure to remember session content; dysfunctional attempts to regain power and control; and premature disclosure of the details of the abuse. Also, we discussed how to address these challenges.
As you probably have observed as have I, many sexually abused male clients are concerned whether or not their abuse will have an effect on their sexuality.
In this section, we will examine the effect of male sexual abuse on sexual identity.
Effects of Abuse on Sexuality
Tony stated, "I didn't do enough to stop it. I think maybe deep down, I wanted it to happen because I thought I was already gay. I told him to stop, but everything else I did almost made it look like I really wanted it to happen." Tony's ambivalent emotions, those of resentment and attraction, as you know are common among society's view of homosexuality today. There is an innate belief that anyone seemingly obstinate in their sexual tendencies wants to be abused in such a manner.
I reminded Tony that, as in the case of male and female abuse, no one wants, truly wants, to be the victim of sexual abuse. I asked Tony, "Did you really want to feel disempowered or weakened?" Tony replied, "No. I wanted my first experience to be better." As you can see, by emphasizing the feeling of disempowerment instead of sexuality, Tony can view his abuse as a boundary violation, not sexual intercourse, which involves consent. Let me repeat that .
As you can see, by emphasizing the feeling of disempowerment instead of sexuality, Tony can view his abuse as a boundary violation, not sexual intercourse, which involves consent.
♦ Technique: Affirmations
The following are
guidelines for Tony to follow:
five points are outlined in the back of your manual.
♦ Effect #2 - Homophobia
Immediately, they come to the conclusion that deep inside,
they must harbor homosexual tendencies. Jared, age 14, a client abused by his
uncle, related, "After it happened, after a couple of months, I found that
I couldn't feel close to anyone. I almost felt a sort of connection to my uncle,
and I hated myself for that. I thought, I had to be gay." I explained to
Jared that the abuse was not sexual, that it had been a matter of justification
This kind of thinking only enhances the conviction in clients that the abuse was a sexual encounter, not a power struggle. I tend to disagree with this line of thought, because it harms the process of desexualizing the abuse.
♦ Technique: Sexuality
-- 1. When sexual abuse of children
occurs, a stranger most often does it.
After he had finished taking the quiz, I told Stephen that the only statement that was true was the last one that states "about half of the male population and one-fourth of the female population report having had a homosexual experience." After this quiz, Stephen said he felt much less ashamed for his feelings.
This "Sexuality Quiz" is found at the back of your manual.
In this section, we have discussed the effect of male sexual abuse on sexual identity.
In the next section, we will examine the condition of rape trauma syndrome in boy clients and its stages: acute and long-term.