Healthcare Training Institute - Quality Education since 1979
CE for Psychologist, Social Worker, Counselor, & MFT!!
On the last track we discussed saying NO to sex and avoiding unwanted sexual advances. This track included three steps to not having to say NO. These three steps are plan ahead, look for signs of possible problems, and know how to communicate your feelings.
On this track we will continue our discussion on saying no to sex. This track will provide responses for your client who was unable to avoid an unwanted sexual advance and must respond to a partner who is ‘coming on strong.’ As with the last track, transference and counter transference issues need to be clearly in the forefront of the therapist’s mind to avoid violating an ethical boundary during these discussions.
For this track, let’s consider April, age 17. April had been trying her best to maintain a platonic relationship with her male friend, Ben. Ben, age 19, often found ways to get April alone and make sexual advances. April stated, "Sometimes I just want to let things happen. It might be easier that way. But I know I’d regret it."
How might you have responded to April?
I stated, "First, remember to think with your head and not with your heart. You already know to avoid hot spots, but if you find yourself in a situation with Ben, consider some of the following responses to pressure lines:
1. "If you love me, you’ll prove it by having sex with me."
2. "If you won’t have sex with me, I don’t want to see you anymore."
3. "If you won’t have sex with me, I’ll find someone who will."
4. "Don’t be afraid. The first time is always scary."
5. "Everybody has sex."
6. "It’s a natural part of life."
7. "You want it as much as I do."
9. "Just relax and let your feelings go."
10. "Don’t worry. I’ve got a condom."
11. "Don’t worry. Nothing will happen."
12. "Don’t you want to do it at least once to see what it’s like?"
13. "Don’t worry. No one will know."
14. "You got me all excited now."
15. "I want to marry you. You know we’re going to get married."
16. "I’ll always love you. Let me share this with you."
17. "Making love will only make our love stronger."
Jenna stated, "Those responses sound great, but I don’t really talk like that." I responded, "Obviously these responses are logical and well thought out. If you don’t speak that way, just say it in your own way. The important thing is that you remember to verbally and non-verbally communicate how you feel. Also, remember that you can sacrifice ‘things’ like belongings, but you should never sacrifice your principles or beliefs, even in marriage."
Think of your Jenna. How might she benefit from these responses to sexual come ons? Would giving her a copy of them from the manual that accompanies this course be productive?
On this track we discussed saying no to sex. This track will provide responses for your client who was unable to avoid an unwanted sexual advance and must respond to a partner who is ‘coming on strong.’
On the next track we will discuss avoiding rape. The focus of the next track is to provide methods for avoiding rape and avoiding date rape.