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Section 2
Are You Blurring Acceptance with Approving?
Question 2
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Next let's look at acceptance and how it affects the setting of ethical boundaries. As you know, acceptance involves recognition of the uniqueness of your client. The genuineness of acceptance and concern for the client is a vital ingredient in the development of boundaries.
♦ Blurring Acceptance with Liking or Approving
Obviously
acceptance is not "liking" or "approving" of the client's
behavior. When you find yourself thinking "I cannot accept the child
rapist" for example, you may be blurring acceptance with liking or approving.
We accept the reality of the individual's situation, but in acceptance you do
not judge the client as being right or wrong, or good or bad, it's just a fact
of what happened.
Here's
an example I recently ran into in the court system of judging based upon personal
values. A custody judge had to make a decision in which both parents had died
in a car accident. The six-year-old girl had to be placed with a family member.
The judge made a decision against the low socio-economic family for the child
custody case, calling the family seeking custody the kind of family that had priscilla curtains in the window. The implication in the judge's voice of "priscilla
curtains" was that they were cheap and tacky. Thus, the message was given
that the family was not capable of loving and providing a good home life for the
child because they were poor.
The self-assessment point to be made here is as
follows: Do I find myself not accepting my client's actions or situations? Do
I end up not accepting the client and judging them?
QUESTION 2
The boundary of acceptance is not to be confused with what? To select
and enter your answer go to Answer Booklet.