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At first Mary again smiles bashfully at me. Again she turns her head away, holding on to her mother's hand and insisting that the mother come with her into the room. Once in the room, however, she lets her mother's hand go and, forgetting about the mother's and my presence, she begins to play animatedly and with obvious determination and goal-mindedness. I quickly close the door and motion the mother to sit down, because I do not want to disturb the play.
Mary goes to the corner where the blocks are on the floor. She selects two blocks and arranges them in such a way that she can stand on them each time she comes to the corner to pick up more blocks. Thus, play begins again with an extension of extremities, this time her feet. She now collects a pile of blocks in the middle of the room, moving to the corner and back without hesitation. Then she kneels on the floor and builds a small house for a toy cow. For about a quarter of an hour she is completely absorbed in the task of arranging the house so that it is strictly rectangular and at the same time fits tightly about a toy cow. She then adds five blocks to one long side of the house and experiments with a sixth block until its position satisfies her (see Figure 10).
This time, then, the dominant emotional note is peaceful play concentration with a certain maternal quality of care and order. There is no climax of excitement, and the play ends on a note of satiation; she has built something, she likes it, now the play is over. She gets up with a radiant smile - which suddenly gives place to a mischievous twinkle. I do not realize the danger I am about to fall victim to, because I am too fascinated by the fact that the close-fitting stable looks like a hand - with a sixth finger. At the same time it expresses the "inclusive" mode, a female-protective configuration, corresponding to the baskets and boxes and cradles arranged by little and big girls to give comfort to small things. Thus we see, so I muse, two restorations in one: The configuration puts the finger back on the hand and the happily feminine pattern belies the "loss from the genital region" previously dramatized. The second hour's play thus accomplishes an expression of restoration and safety - and this concerning the same body parts (hand, genital region) which in the play disruption of the first hour had appeared as endangered.
But, as I said, Mary has begun to look teasingly at me. She now laughs, takes her mother's hand and pulls her out of the room, saying with determination, "Mommy, come out." I wait for a while, then look out into the waiting room. A loud and triumphant, "Thtay in there!" greets me. I strategically withdraw, whereupon Mary closes the door with a bang. Two further attempts on my part to leave my room are greeted in the same way. She has me cornered.
There is nothing to do but to enter into the spirit of the game. I open the door slightly, quickly push the toy cow through the opening, make it squeak, and withdraw it. Mary is beside herself with pleasure and insists that the game be repeated a few times. She gets her wish, then it is time for her to go home. When she leaves she looks triumphantly and yet affectionately at me and promises to come back. I am left with the task of figuring out what has happened.
From anxiety in the autosphere in the first hour, Mary had now graduated to satiation in the microsphere - and to triumph in the macrosphere. She had taken the mother out of my space and locked me into it. This game had as content: a man is teasingly locked into his room. It was only in connection with this playful superiority that Mary had decided to talk to me, and this in no uncertain terms. "Thtay in there!" were the first words she had ever addressed to me! They were said clearly and in a loud voice, as if something in her had waited for the moment when she would be free enough to say them.
does that mean?
To some this may seem
like a lot of complicated and devious reasoning for such a little girl. But here
it is well to realize that these matters are difficult for rational thinking only.
It would indeed be difficult to think up such a series of play tricks. It is even
difficult to recognize and analyze it. But it happens, of course, unconsciously
and automatically: here, never underestimate the power of the ego - even of such
a little girl.
Reflection Exercise #8
Winburn, A., Perepiczka, M., Frankum, J., & Neal, S. (2020). Play therapists’ empathy levels as a predictor of self-perceived advocacy competency. International Journal of Play Therapy, 29(3), 144–154.